Loose Ends

by Dave Stagner

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This is a collection of demos, scratch recordings, and other old junk. I do not vouch for recording or performance quality, but some of it is pretty interesting.


released July 23, 2016

Guitars and vocals by Dave Stagner. All songs written by Dave Stagner, except "Sing" written in 1971 by Joe Raposo.




Dave Stagner Minneapolis, Minnesota

I am a guitarist, songwriter, recording engineer, and musical polymath based in Minneapolis.

I have played in countless bands over the years, most notably the Feng Shui Ninjas, Beth Kinderman & the Player Characters, and Al Amarja.

All recordings produced at Extraterrestrial Highway, my home studio. I love living in the future!
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Track Name: I Won't
I won't climb Mount Everest
I won't ever do my best
I won't blow the Sphinx's nose
I won't love with both eyes closed
I won't crash into the Moon
I won't be your trial balloon
I won't get a second chance
To stumble through this lifelong dance
I won't vow silence
I won't vow chastity
But I might consider fasting for a while...

There are so many things that I won't do
Like I won't write this song about you

When I say I won't touch the cold of space
It's not about you
When I say I won't own the human race
It's not about you
When I swear I'll never get used to the smell of bullshit
It's not about you either
Why does every fucking thing have to be about you?
You you you you you

There are so many things that I won't do
Like I won't write this song about you

I won't ever turn and run
I won't steal except for fun
I won't travel back in time
I won't force this goddamned rhyme
I won't ever lock my door
I won't kick puppies anymore
I won't tell you who I am
Coz frankly, I don't give a damn
I won't surrender
I won't kill anyone
And I swear I won't act stupid when you smile

There are so many things that I won't do
Like I won't write this song about you
Track Name: Oncoming Train Blues
I used to use her toothbrush
She took the toothpaste too
And the pots and pans and furniture
Dishes and shampoo
Now I'm sitting in my underwear
Throwing beer cans at the wall
I'd phone and threaten suicide
Don't know where to call

She left me her cell phone
In pieces on the floor
She's harshing my mellow
Don't know what for

She'll come back once she understands
She's the one who's wrong
I don't know what I see in her
She's hardly worth this song
She'll beg me for forgiveness
She'll get down on her knees
She'll come back any day now
Come back any day now
Come back any day now
Come back any...

Light in the tunnel
Oncoming train
Wounds self inflicted
Worst kind of pain
Track Name: Sometimes
Stripe of orange paint 'round the old elm tree
at the corner, the last one on the block
My dog sniffs the trunk like he always does
Lifts his leg and says "I was here too"
And the sign on the curb says
"No parking monday 8 to 4
Tree work, order of the city"
In the dappled shade that won't be here tomorrow
Lost in thought, til my dog tugs on the leash

Sometimes I forget to eat
Sometimes I forget to breathe
Sometimes I forget where I am

We walk on to the falls, and down the steps
The creek is swollen from the rain
The sun is out, the air is cool
A rainbow hovers in the mist
For a thousand years this creek has cut this rock
In a million more it'll all be gone
My dog is waiting, I say his name
He looks at me and we walk away

Sometimes I forget to eat
Sometimes I forget to breathe
Sometimes I forget where I am
Track Name: Party at the Halfway House
Jesus in one ear, the Devil in the other
In her left hand there's a beer, in her right hand there's another
She's such an old woman for such a young mother
There's a party at the halfway house

Her younger one's six, her older one's ten
And she's just so proud of her little men
Maybe next month they'll let her see them again
It's a party at the halfway house

A life to be proud of, the wife of a good man
She'd have it all if she just tried
But deep down she knows better, this road just goes nowhere
The only way off it is high

Sunday is church, she'll dress all in blue
Hung over and praying not to hurl in the pew
Them church ladies love to feel better than you
It's a party at the halfway house

A house with a garden, a car and a tv
And everything money can buy
She can feel things are changing, her new life is waiting
The best way to get there is high

Jesus in one ear, the Devil in the other
Salvation is one way, getting high is another
Coz Hell's all around her, but Heaven's above her
There's a party at the halfway house
There's a party at the halfway house
Track Name: Fireworks Pornography and Cheese (live at Marscon 2013)
Driving through Wisconsin, going to or from Chicago
You're probably stuck on Highway 94
You may need gas or coffee, or you maybe wanna pee
More likely you're just feeling really bored
Construction cones and moo cows, radar traps and roadkill
Billboards shouting everywhere you see
The billboards tell you what's in store if you dare leave ol' 94
Fireworks pornography and cheese

The Dells are just a tourist trap, Madison's just students
Some people drink Milwaukee's shitty beer
No one knows why Tomah's there, that's also true about Eau Claire
Hudson just means Minnesota's near
We save the best for the middle, or well maybe, I won't go there
The punchline of this joke, Menomonie
(doo doo dee dee doo)
(doo doo dee doo)

Menomonie, monotony, monotony, monotony
Fireworks pornography and cheese

The highway
America's love affair with road trips
The slowest way of getting there - no, that's steamships
But steamships cannot get you across Wisconsin
It's not slow, it's just way too long

Are we there yet?

Harleys in the summer, snowplows when it snows
Trailers filled up to the brim with junk
Buses, milk trucks, moving vans, SUVs with Packer fans
Rusty cars with deer strapped to the trunk
Smoke bombs and M80s, anal lesbo nurses
Cheese of almost every sort but brie
You can live without this stuff, but you don't really wanna
Fireworks pornography and cheese

Your money's gone and so's your gas
You can't escape Wisconsin
Your car's filled with explosives, food and sleaze
You didn't mean to buy it all
But you just had to go there
Fireworks pornography and cheese

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